Caring

Caring is hard. Caring about someone in particular is even harder. Because you know that when they're not ok, you won't be either. Being scared and worried about something that seems so small to others, but it seems to be the only thing you can think about. They absorb your mind, and capture your attention. To put it simply, it feels like you have placed your life in their hands, without even having a say in the matter. And then sometimes I wonder if it's possible to care too much... because if you didn't care, then you wouldn't have these problems in  the first place. Yet even through all of this pain... the only thing I want is for them to be better. I have stepped back from there life in order to make that happen. Yes, I admit it's hard... but even if it kills me, I know it will help. Even though I'm sick because of stress, even though I seem so angry and full of hate to so many people, I'm putting all of that aside and making sure that what is important to me has the chance to be happy. Because I forgot what happiness feels like, but it sounds amazing... and they deserve amazing.