Lies

I try not to lie to the people I care about... I'm good about it. But sometimes you can't help it. Sometimes it has to be done for the best. Not that excuse of "I did it to protect you."  That's shit. I mean the lies where there's no other option or way out.

But at the same time I feel like my life is a lie. I don't know what I'm doing, I can't comprehend why I am the way I am, or why I feel so buried all the time. Like I need washed. Just a dirty old rag becoming something it's not. It needs a rinse to get that layer of dirt off. It needs help to become what it really is. Not some dirty, old, muddy piece of fabric. It needs to become that clean, dull, used up rag that became your best friend.

Stop covering yourself in lies, and just be what you want. No one else should give a hoot. You should be comfortable with what you want to do, and how you want to live. If you want to work fast food the rest of your life, you do that! If you want to be a dinosaur when you grow up, then you be that freaking dinosaur!

But when you get lost, you need to sit and think. You need to be able to decide for yourself. Put aside everyone else. Their thoughts, opinions, rules, options, actions, lives. You need to sit down and think for yourself. Not for the benefit of others. You need to sit there and think about what YOU want to do for a change.